Valencia Is Magic – Blog 3: Shedding, Softening, Surrendering

There was a blackout in Spain. 

The day after I left my new hubby behind.

He had crossed a boundary—one I hold sacred.
So I did what I do. I packed my bags, after I caught up on a bit of work, and secured my banking app.. and  drove off in my favorite cabriolet. She is always there for me.. 
No goodbye. Just me reclaiming me.

Ten days later, I am ready to return—not to him, but to the stillness I carry now, the clarity that Cabanyal gave me. A week and a half of sunlight, sea air, red tea, and soulful meetings.

My little cabriolet? Impounded.
And oddly… I like it.
Let it go.
Shedding feels good.
The upkeep was too much.
The money wasn’t there.
The windows broken, the burden heavy.

This is how I live:
On intuition.
On edge.
On freedom.

I like it when the system helps me declutter.
By following rules I never do.
It clears my path.

At 54, I don’t feel the need to blend in anymore.
Let them take my broken-window car.
I tried to save her. But maybe I was the one who needed saving.

—

And then… there’s this man.
A big Finnish bear of a man.
Two houses, two bikes, a Vespa, a Mini Cooper, a pool, a boat… beds.
(We’re still figuring out the last part.)

He wants me.
He sees me.
He eats my vegetarian food and says it’s delicious.
He’s walked away from the excesses of his past life—food, alcohol, distraction.
He listens.
He holds space.
He takes up space.
And sometimes… he takes my space.

But no one else wants to.
That’s the cold truth of this angelic life.
Not even my spiritual family gets me.
Not fully.
Other HSPs, sure. But they’re in their own worlds.

So I cave.
I give in.
I say yes.
To him.
To the two houses, the motorbikes, the Vespa, the Mini, the pool, the dreams.

I’ll keep booking my little Airbnbs in Valencia—my soul’s nook.
And he can have me.
We’ll find our rhythm.
We’ll find middle ground.

Ten days alone taught me this:
Even when you're best friends with God,
It’s okay to want a body beside you.
It’s okay to land.
It’s okay to be held.

Mama, I think I’m grounding in this man.